Doggy Style

Everything was going fine with this lady until it came time to pay. Here's my checklist, when tendering the order:

1. Select payment method.
2. Ensure payment is correct.
3. Accept payment.
4. Double-check receipt.
5. Finalize sale (signatures, etc).
6. Give last-minute blurbs about product (You can install this two times!).
7. "Thank you, and have a good day!"

Here was her checklist, around the time I got to my #2:

1. Select blurry, noisy wallpaper of dogs on laptop.
2. Show me wallpaper on laptop.
3. Gush about dogs.
4. Ignore request to pay for products.
5. Gush about dogs.
6. Ignore attempt at friendly smalltalk.
7. Yessiree, gush about dogs.
8. These dogs are the best.
9. Did I mention how much I love my dogs?
10. Talk to wallpaper of dogs, as if they were actual dogs.
11. Complete transaction while playing a rousing game of "Just how much can I gush about my dogs in five minutes?"
12. Leave, still gushing.

World, meet Customer of the Year 2010 contender #1: Crazy Dog Lady. She needs a boyfriend.